Especially neither awkward gestures nor embarrassing premature ejaculation! Make love with brio to fill it and follow these six rules to ask for more
Step 1: Raise the pressure
You live as a single person and your new relationship becomes more serious. You need to calm your cravings, that’s understandable. Satisfaction alone relieves and we also learn to control ourselves: a valuable asset when the fateful moment arrives!
” When a man masturbates , he must know how to measure his level of excitement. Level 8 is the point of no return, it must not exceed level 6 or 7, then it goes down to level 2 or 3. Thus, he can master tarvos testo his orgasm when he is with his partner » says Marianne Brandon, clinical psychologist.
In addition, when you masturbate during the period before your first sexual intercourse, do not use pornographic material, but think of the one that will be yours soon. ” Fantasies must remain realistic. Ask yourself why she excites you. Imagine that you undress her. Train mentally to have fun with her and not with a porn actress. ”
Nevertheless, to intensify this expectation, it is better to involve the partner. Before seeing her again, ask her what arouses her desire. If you call him late one night, tell him to describe a movie scene that she found erotic. This creates intimacy. She will feel closer to you and reveal her tastes. During the week before your meeting, send her messages so that she can tell you what sensations or perfumes, music, food make her want to make love. You will thus spur his impatience while showing him that you want to satisfy his desires.
Steps 2: Stay on course
Since the morning, you dream of your first night together when, at the last minute, your boss charges you to take care of a huge project that monopolizes all your attention: the consequence can be a bitter disappointment at the end of the day!
However, physiological reactions to stress can be a brake on libido. Under the duvet with this beautiful girl, you will be busy mentally compose the emails to send (yes, it can happen even if it’s your first time with a new conquest.) The solution: call your breath. Studies show that men who practice meditation are better at bed.
Simply concentrating on the passage of air from the nostrils to the abdomen avoids scattering. Keep your eyes open. Look at your partner and ask him to look at you. When you close your eyes, the mind is more easily obscured by negative thoughts. Is his attention wandering?
In this case, you must act and get your sweetheart to focus on what is happening between you. You can, for example, ask her how your antics would happen if she gave free rein to her fantasy: thus focused on what fuels his desire, his thoughts will turn away from his pending files or his list of commissions. You can also try to brighten up his feelings by dragging an ice cube on his body, for example. The mobilization of the five senses is a great way to stop thinking about anything and to immerse yourself in the present experience.
Step 3: Work the mind
The famous evening has arrived and you are a little tense (she, too). Of course, as soon as she joins you at the bar, you order a whiskey, then another and another one. Certainly, an excess of alcohol can hinder erection and orgasm but, on the other hand, drinking promotes relaxation and flirts more easily.
In fact, far from being caused by the drink, this relaxation could well be induced by yourself: researchers at the University of Buffalo found that subjects who had consumed a drink they believed alcoholic let go as s they had really drunk alcohol.
Know that you can chase your tensions just as easily by being sober: just stay positive and relax . A third beer tempts you? It will then be necessary to drink water between each glass and to have sufficiently eaten before. And do not forget that a woman is more receptive if she feels confident with a man and if he is honest and honest.
In other words, what she wants to discover is the person you really are and not the thirsty who flirts with her.
Step 4: Install the trigger
You started to undress each other when she suddenly twitched. You ask what’s wrong, but she hardly dares to look at you. Naturally, this destabilizes you, because it shot you fiery glances just a moment ago. In fact, it has nothing to do with you: she does so because she feels uncomfortable. ” You must help him open his body and his heart. It’s up to you to make her feel safe, “Brandon advises.
Start exploring your bodies well before entering the room. Hold his hand, touch his shoulders, flatter the hollow of his loins. You need to build confidence and increase your oxytocin (attachment hormone) level: caresses will help you, and she will feel closer to you . But do not stop at physical contact only, express your appreciation in words. Give him sincere compliments, especially on attributes that are not expressly sexual: his little cute nose, his soft skin.
To compliment the person, is to say to him somehow “that we are aware of the defects that it may be but they do not bother us, or that we are so under the spell that we do not do not notice them. ”
Step 5: Let her lead the dance
Generally, you should not want to do too much the first time with a new girlfriend . But what if she is quite comfortable and takes the reins abruptly? The apprehension of the result may then settle: will you bother him, not manage to give him pleasure, to disappoint? This can lead to an even more fatal mistake: seeking to overcompensate.
” Our culture focuses on the sexual performance of men and their ability to make the relationship last ,” says Brandon. So stop asking yourself questions, think instead to savor your hugs: the solution is then to return the favor.
” Often, women who like to dominate like to be dominated. Be aggressive: grasp his hands and hold them over his head. If it excites you too much, turn it over to fully control the situation . These little tricks have the double advantage of diverting your attention from your erection (and therefore of prolonging your relationship) and of showing her that she has found her equal on the sexual plane.
Step 6: Talk about it after
Your hug is over, you are both satisfied, at least you think so. After your passionate antics, she will probably feel obliged to ask you if you have taken as much pleasure as she. We live in a society where we have to succeed and people often want to know if their partner has reached orgasm or appreciate their way to kiss. But it’s not just the curiosity that drives your sweet friend to snuggle against you and talk.
” After orgasm, the body releases oxytocin, ” says Stanley Althof, general manager of the Marriage and Sexual Counseling Center in South Florida. ” The feeling of proximity and trust is strengthened, we want to touch each other, to embrace each other, to stay against each other. ”
This hormonal secretion can also cause the desire to sleep, but you have to resist. Invoke the dialogue by asking her sincerely how she feels, for example. If you are both too tired for a long conversation, just ask yourself two or three questions. When you’re fresh again, maybe the next day at breakfast or any other time you can meet, you’ll have plenty of time to review your love affair … and, as long as you’re there, start it again!